Does the thought of someone praising you for having a sexy moan, a great penis, or lickable thighs make you hot with lust, and embarrassment? Stop hiding that glorious penis, don't cover those heart pounding thighs, and let that hypnotic moan fall from your lips! Having a praise kink is nothing to be ashamed about.
One of the biggest issues with partners and bedroom play is a lack of being honest and upfront about their needs. This can create feelings of poor performance anxiety and can create a buzzkill for bedroom play experience.
A praise kink can help you perform better in the bedroom, boost your confidence, and communicate better about your sexual needs. Therefore bring more heat to sheets. Plus you’ll develop a stronger sense of trust and intimacy between you and your partner.
By the end of this article you’ll be liberated, confident, and enhance your sex life with praise!
Read on to celebrate the orgasmic power of praise kink!
What is a Praise Kink?
The definition for a praise kink is: “a sexual fetish that focuses on excessive amounts of positive affirmations, verbal gratification that eludes joy and positivity, or an unlimited source of verbal reward.
Are verbal compliments your love language? This kink may be the perfect start to exploring your kinky side if you are just beginning your kinky quest.
Praise Kink Psychology
You might be curious about knowing the scientific and psychological factors that come into play with praise kinks. In this section you’ll find the answers to these questions.
It’s important to note there is a deeper aspect to praise kink than being told you have nice eyes, or a nice purse, or that you dress well.
Praise kink takes it to a whole new level by providing orally pleasing comments that erotically charge your experiences in the bedroom.
Drives Focus
When you decide to explore your kink for uplifting verbal acknowledgements you may notice that you respond to a certain comment, or compliment a specific part of your partner’s body more often. There is a psychological link between a praise kink and enhancing focus.
This can help you with holding orgasms longer, enjoying your time in the bedroom without anxiety, and even can help you with tasks such as stroking your partner’s penis or clitoris for a longer period.
Discomfort From Embarrassment
There are studies that show that becoming embarrassed can be a kink in itself.
However, unlike the vulnerability that comes from negative verbal reprimands or degradation play, the sensation of feeling unsafe is sparked by positive articulation instead.
Have you ever had a night out with the guys, or attended a bachelorette party with the ladies and received a positive compliment that made your cheeks flush? This is an example of struggling to appreciate a compliment.
Discomfort can be a connected taboo in the world of kink. Such as those with a praise kink.
For example, not all masochists enjoy inducing physical pain. Some enjoy making their victims squirms from emotional torment instead. What better way than to give someone positive compliments on their derrière who may not accept positive verbal rewards well?
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What Creates a Praise Kink?
While there is not a lot of research to be found around the entirety of verbal praise kink psychology, psychologists agree there are some contributing factors.
Low Self Esteem
You may have grown up in a family who didn’t tell you how awesome all of the paintings that you made for them were. Or how much they appreciated your help cleaning around the house. Did you show them your A+ report card and all they did was nod and then go back to their phone call?
These are all examples of how low self esteem stems from early experiences usually in your childhood or early teenage years. These experiences teach you early on to hold back your feelings or needs and put them aside to please others.
In your adult years, this can stem from settling for poor bedroom play partners, putting aside your needs to please your spouse’s demands in the bedroom, or agreeing to a vanilla sex life because your partner isn’t willing to explore with you.
Validation
It feels good to hear that you gave him an unforgettable blow job. It’s sexy to hear that she has never gotten off on oral until your tongue worked wonders on her clit. Or that your threesome created a supercharged orgasm between all three partners.
A praise kink takes being complimented a step further by providing validation. When you receive validation that you lacked in your childhood, it can become addictive and bring forward an intense orgasm. Hence having a praise kink.
After all we are a species that relies heavily on emotional connection.
Love Language
As previously mentioned if you have a love language that is connected with oral award then a praise kink could be a sexual manifestation of your love language.
A Scientific Look at Praise Kinks
When someone awards you with a compliment or verbal gift such as a relationship offer or compromising to explore a kink you’re interested in, it stimulates a part of your brain called the Striatum.
The striatum is one part of your brain that is connected to rewards. Scientifically when someone stimulates your striatum it helps to enhance your growth, therefore, enhancing your performance whether it’s while giving oral, dominating a submissive, or even delivering a potent BDSM play scene.
Learn more about the science behind praise kinks below:
Do I Have a Praise Kink?
If you’re still confused about whether or not you have a praise kink here are some pointers to get you started:
- A stranger tells you that you have amazing abs at the gym. Your face flushes and as the stranger walks away you notice a sudden bulge in your shorts, or soaked panties.
- You’re in a new relationship with someone and you two decide to get hot and heavy. You remove your pants and they tell you how sexy your hips are, or how hot those boxers look on you.
- You get wet with excitement when you tell a submissive how good they are at nibbling your ear.
- Your master tells you he’s going to spend extra time ravishing your clit with his tongue.
While there is not a certain way to define having a praise kink for one person for the other, if giving or receiving a sexy compliment gets you hot and bothered, you may have a praise kink.
Awaken the dominant female energy within you! Read our femdom guide for beginners:
Why Do I Have a Praise Kink?
Remember it’s sexy to be turned on by verbal comments. You don’t need to feel any shame in getting aroused by sexual affirmations that arouse positivity.
There is nothing wrong with you for having a praise kink. Don’t forget, having a praise kink is a natural occurrence since rewards stimulate your striatum. This in turn helps you to perform better both in your sex life and mundane life.
There are no right or wrong answers on why your engine revs every time you receive or give a positive compliment.
Here are a few reasons:
You’ve experienced a partner who insulted your bedroom performance.
You dated someone who treated you terribly.
You grew up around people who didn’t believe in giving positive gratification.
Having a praise kink can help you overcome trauma and heal from negative experiences in life. There is no shame in that!
Want to explore the erotic realms of your subconscious? Read our article on hypnokink below:Praise Kink Examples
In this section, we’ll include some scenarios to help you connect and understand your positive affirmation arousal.
Example One
Kendra struggles with vaginal orgasm which leaves her feeling a bit insecure about pleasing Kenny. She knows how important vaginal orgasm is for her husband.
On a surprise vacation, Kenny ties her arms to the top posts of the spacious bed.
He applies a blindfold causing her to gasp and smile in approval. He then fastens thigh spreads to each of her muscular thighs to keep them spread apart.
“You’re such a beautiful, vulnerable wife. This position looks so sexy on you,” he whispers into her ear.
Chills rain down her spine, followed by hot, moist pre-cum between her legs.
He probes her swollen clit with the tip of his tongue drawing circles around the sensitive button.
She tips her head back and says “My goodness, Kenny you’ve gotten even better at foreplay. I can’t get enough”.
The words sizzle through his brain as he licks faster, bringing her near orgasm. When he slips his tongue inside her tight pussy, she screams out in climax.
Her veginal cum stains the bed and all down Kenny’s face and chin.
The erotic verbal word play drove them both into such an intimately charged desire that they make love all night and into the blazing sun of the following morning.
Thus, Kendra achieves complete vaginal orgasm.
Toys Mentioned In This Example:
1. Blindfold (our top recommendation here)
2. Spreader bar (our top recommendation here).
Example Two
Macie is dating a new guy who is a virgin. He wants to make their first time memorable but has no idea what to do.
Macie knows that verbal play in a positive manner makes Nathan cum. So she gives him a few tips on how to get her going.
He takes her earlobe into his mouth. Gently tracing around the sensitive lobe with teeth and tongue.
Macie tells him how good it feels to have his mouth on her.
Giving Nathan an extra confidence boost, he climbs on top of her. He pumps himself against her vagina as if he’s got a PHD in vaginal penetration. She clutches onto his chiseled back muscles and both cum in unison.
Their first time together becomes so erotically charged from verbal praise that Macy wants to continue seeing him.
Within a few years, the two go from dating to engaged and live aroused ever after!
34 Praise Kink Phrases
Want to explore your praise kink tonight? Here are 34 praise kink examples to get you started!
How did you learn to circle my vagina with your cock like that? You must be Some sort of sex god!
Those legs could go on for miles!
I love the way those eyes peer into my soul as you fuck me.
You’re a good girl for cleaning the room like I asked you. I’ll reward you after dinner.
That shirt makes me want to rip it of and fuck you in front of everyone.
You are mine.
I am yours.
That tongue of yours is lovely. What else can it do?
You have a great stare.
I’d love to tickle your six pack with my tongue until you explode!
Good kitten
Good slave
Good submissive
That lipstick looks beautiful on your inviting lips.
You look beautiful in those ropes.
That blindfold looks incredible on you.
I love the way your mouth takes over my lips.
I love how good you have gotten at sucking my cock.
Someone has improved their deep throat skills.
That nightie makes you look so fuckabe. I must have you right now!
You have sexy breasts.
I could stare at that ass all day.
You are the best dom I have ever had.
You know just what I need to cum for you all night long.
Having you In my arms reminds me I’m right where I belong.
Look at these yummy toes! I must take a taste!
I crave to lick you into submission.
You are the most divine sub I’ve ever dominated.
You make the world a sexier place.
I love it when you beg.
Your hair feels incredible between my fingers.
You’re a skilled tickler. I can’t get enough!
You are the best partner.
You are incredible at lap dances.
Conclusion
There is no shame in getting off to positive verbal cues. Whether you like to reward your submissive or have your dom make you squirm from positive oral compliments your praise kink is validated.
Don’t be afraid to play around with the praise kink phrases we have provided or get creative and make your own. Remember it’s all about feel good orgasms and verbal reward!
How will you stimulate your striatum with sexy praise?
Curious about other kinks? Read our blog!