The throat is a sensitive, vulnerable, and thrilling part of the body. No surprise wearing a BDSM collar in the bedroom is a fairly common fantasy for most people.
There are a lot of options with a lot of different purposes. We cover our 7 top picks in this article.
But before we dive into that... we're going to provide some background information. So you can make a more informed choice.
Of course, there are many different identities that can be assumed in the BDSM realm. But for simplicity's sake, I will be referring to the person wearing the collar as “The Submissive” (or Sub) and the person giving the collar as “The Dominant” (or Dom).
How To Choose The Right Collar
The best starting point is to ask yourself “What purpose do I want this collar to serve?”
- Do you want a collar that you can attach a leash to so that you can walk around on a collar and leash (or walk someone else around on a collar and leash)?
- Do you want a subtle collar that can be worn in public without raising much suspicion?
- Do you want a collar that attaches to the wrist or ankle cuffs as a restraint?
If you don’t have the answer to these questions, no worries. We’ll give you some ideas and show you some collar options so you can choose which is best for you.
To help answer that question, let’s first look at some of the different kinds of collars.
Different Kinds of BDSM Collars
Not only are there many kinds of different collars, but there are also a lot of different meanings attached to any given collar.
If you’re looking to spice things up in the bedroom, maybe wearing the collar (and any attachment to it) is for you.
Furthermore, putting a collar on your partner in the bedroom might signify some sort of power exchange. This can be conscious or subconscious. But will almost certainly mean ‘fun’ is about to be had.
Slave Collars
Within the BDSM community, some collars given to a Sub can have meaning akin to a wedding ring. Sometimes, like a wedding, there will be a “collaring ceremony.”
These are meant to symbolize the Sub’s devotion to the Dom. They are not taken lightly.
Sometimes these collars are made of metal, even sometimes using a lock holding it on the submissive, with the key being held by the Dominant.
These are often called slave collars.
Often, these slave collars can be described as “less than discrete.”
Day Collars
If there is a 24/7 dynamic between the Dom and the Sub and the collar is to be worn at all times, there’s a more discrete “public friendly” option. Often, when a Sub is “collared” he or she might opt for a “day collar.”
These day collars often pass as a simple necklace - something that anyone who sees it would be none the wiser to. But the significance of the collar remains the same and just serves as a reminder of the Sub’s devotion to the Dom.
Pet Collars
For people who are into pet play, sometimes a dog collar or cat collar is exactly what they want. Because it’s intended for pet play, they usually have a D-ring they can attach a leash (or lead, depending on where you’re from) to walk the pet around.
An ex-submissive of mine used to like dressing up in kitty ears and would sometimes use face paint to make a cute little nose and whiskers on her face. But her favorite part was wearing one (of many) collars in her collection of kitten collars.
Her preferred one was pink and had a little bell that would jingle any time she moved, just like you would find on a normal cat collar.
Naughty Play Collars
Then, we have what I will refer to as naughty play collars.
All of the collars I reviewed for this article and most other collars that most kinksters use fall under this list.
They’re often made of leather, faux leather, neoprene, nylon, or a combination of those materials. Usually, they will have a D-ring (or multiple D-rings) on them giving the option to attach other toys (like cuffs, nipple clamps, etc) to it.
What Are The Benefits Of Wearing A BDSM Collar?
There are tons of different benefits to glean from using a collar, so it really depends on what you’re looking for.
Every collar will add some kinky visual appeal to the person wearing it. If that’s what you’re looking for, almost any collar will work. Of course, some collars do look a bit more “BDSM-y” than others, so it’s completely up to you.
Do you want a simple collar and leash so that you can walk your sub around the bedroom (or your local dungeon at your next play party)? There are numerous collar and leash combos for that.
Maybe you want a collar that has D-ring attachments so you can attach wrist cuffs to add some bondage play in the bedroom.
Maybe you have no interest in attaching anything to the collar, but would prefer one that simply states “You are mine.”
Safety While Wearing A BDSM Collar
Any time there’s something going around the throat, there must always be extra precautions taken to ensure that person will be able to breathe.
Of course, this means making sure the collar isn’t too tight around the neck - restricting neither the airway nor blood flow to the brain.
If you’re using a collar that has attachments - say, wrist cuffs - you must make sure that when those cuffs are pulled on, it will add extra pressure to the collar around the neck. So just because it was loose enough at the beginning of the scene, doesn’t necessarily mean there won’t be moments where there is added pressure to the throat.
Thankfully, most collars, once put around the neck, won’t tighten up on their own. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth giving breath and blood flow some extra thought to keep your sub safe
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Things To Look For In A BDSM Collar...
Now that you have an idea of what you want in a collar, some things to look out for are…
Quality
A high quality collar, using quality materials that are properly sewn together will last you many years.
Attachments
Some collars have one (or more) D-rings attached to them. Not only do you want to look for a quality metal (i.e, something that won’t rust), you also want to make sure the D-rings are sewn onto the collar properly - lest the threads begin to come undone after a little bit of tension is applied.
What’s The Best Way To Use BDSM Collars?
Whatever way you want!
Keep it in the bedroom to add a little bit of spice by asking (making?!) your partner wear it during sex and everything that comes right before it.
Maybe a slightly discrete BDSM collar is what you want to wear during the day, adding a “my kinky little secret” angle to say, grocery shopping or... visiting grandma.
Adding a collar and cuff set to your collection of sex toys is a great way to experiment with bondage.
Collars are extremely versatile and can be used for nearly any kinky desire your dirty mind can think up. So decide which one you want, what you want to use it for, then have fun with it!
Our BDSM Collar Reviews...
Bondage Boutique Faux Leather Collar and Cuff Set
This faux leather collar is soft in all the right places, making it super comfortable to wear during playtime.
The construction is sturdy and provides a nice feel for a bit of the rough stuff. Both the buckles and the chains are heavy duty, making sure it won’t be removed until it’s time to do so.
If you want to wear this but still have some dexterity, you might find the chains that connect the wrist cuffs to the collar to be a bit short. But if you’re using this with the intention of restricting movement, it’s exactly what you need.
Even without the leash and wrist cuffs attached, this collar looks awesome with the 3 D-rings. The black D-rings and chains really add to the “BDSM” feel of this. The only negative I can find with this is that I wish the lead was a chain. Instead, it’s nylon - but to be fair, it does still get the job done.
Pros
Cons
DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Collar with Cock Ring
This is unlike any collar I’ve ever seen before, so it definitely wins creativity points!
The leather collar is high quality and is comfortable on the skin. The buckle is high quality and there are enough holes in the strap that I think would fit around most necks.
As for sizing, though… The rest is a bit hit or miss. If it fits you perfectly, it will be a HIT! They do offer a few size variations with the two differently sized cock rings. I managed to squeeze my stuff in through the 2-inch ring just fine. The 1.6-inch ring was a bit tight.
I’m 5’6 and the chain was a bit long for me. I was hoping that it would remain slightly taut when I was standing, to keep a constant bit of pressure on the cock ring any time I moved. For me, it was a bit long. But that just gave the missus some incentive to pull on the chain, which definitely reminded me who was in charge.
Pros
Cons
Sportsheets Neck and Wrist Restraint
This is a great piece of kit for anyone who wants to experiment with both collars and bondage. It’s clearly meant for bondage, coming with two wrist cuffs that clip to the attached harness. And it’s built like it’s meant for bondage. The nylon straps are sturdy, as are the D-rings attached. The neoprene padding is soft, comfortable, and doesn’t leave marks.
I’d say this is a great collar for anyone who wants to try bondage but wants to dip their toes in the water first. The wrist cuffs are closed with velcro but are still sturdy and it would be difficult to get out of simply by pulling on them. But because they’re velcro, they’re easy to undo if you want to get out of bondage in a pinch.
I’d also say this is great for experimenting with bondage because of the versatility of the whole thing. The collar and harness can be worn to the front or back, and with different D-ring placements, you can decide just how confined the person wearing it is.
Pros
Cons
OUR TOP PICK! 
Bondage Boutique Dominant Dream Bondage Kit (6 Piece)
Right off the bat, this is obviously much more than just a collar and leash. The collar (and all four cuffs) are very comfortable and the velcro straps are both sturdy and secure while being easy to do and undo quickly. The D-rings are solid and the buckle on the leash is great, although I wish the leash was made of chains like the cuff set.
The collar, multiple cuffs, leash, and chains make this whole set very versatile - you can do almost anything your perverted mind can think up with this kit. The blindfold is great and doesn’t move around. The flogger is great - it’s small enough so that a beginner could use it and depends on how you use it, can be used for some light love touches or some skin-reddening-smacks.
The ball gag was breathable, but slightly too large and hard, making wearing it for long a bit difficult.
Pros
Cons
Bondage Boutique Black Rose Wrist-to-Collar Restraint Set
This is a beautifully crafted collar set. The faux leather looks and feels great and is comfortable for long term usage. The D-rings are sturdy and high quality. The all black rings, chains, and leather all look amazing for a really fun BDSM feel.
The chains that connect the wrist cuffs to the collar are one length, which means for a beginner they might be perfect so you can feel “in bondage” while still being able to move a bit. If you’re looking for a more strict bondage experience, these will probably offer the person wearing it more mobility than you want.
The black chains look nice, but I wish they were attached to the collar with clips so you can remove them and use the collar just by itself.
Pros
Cons
Bondage Boutique Lead Me On Soft Collar and Leash
This is a perfect no-frills “A collar and leash are what I want” entry-level bondage collar kit. It definitely provides a nice “submission” feel to it once it’s on and your partner has the leash by the hand.
The velcro strap (as opposed to a buckle with pre-drilled holes) means it will fit around any neck perfectly. Although, sometimes hair does get caught in the velcro.
The quality is high and sturdy enough to withstand some gentle (or not so gentle) tugging. If you do use it for tugging someone around, the thickness of the collar spreads the pressure around your neck, making it extremely comfortable.
It’s basic, but it’s great for beginners looking to try a collar and leash.
Pros
Cons
BASICS Collar with Nipple Clamps
This is just as the name implies: A basic collar with nipple clamps. The collar itself is made of nylon, which is comfortable at first but after a while, it starts to dig into your neck a little bit. A little added padding would go a long way.
The nipple clamps are pretty versatile, depending on how much pressure you like on your nipples. For someone with sensitive nipples, the adjustable screw is perfect for making sure they don’t pinch too hard.
For someone who likes a bit more pain during their nipple play, you can take the black plastic pieces off for some more hardcore sensations.
Sadly, it doesn’t come with a leash to attach to the collar D-ring, which leaves a little bit to be desired for collar and leash play. But if that’s no concern to you, it serves its purpose as a collar with nipple clamps just fine.
The chains resting on your chest give a really nice feel on your skin.
Pros
Cons
Conclusion...
When it’s all said and done, the Bondage Boutique Dominant Dream Bondage Kit (6 Piece) is the best collar and leash set here. The construction of the collars and cuffs, the versatility of all the included pieces (gag, blindfold, and flogger), and the look of the black faux leather and silver chains put this above the rest.
It will take care of your “collar and leash” kink and provide some extra toys for you to use with them.
This kit is perfect for taking any and all of your kinky ideas and putting them into action in (or out!) of the bedroom. Adding this to your nightstand will definitely keep you busy for a long time!