Best Bad Dragon Dildo Ultimate Guide 2023 (And Cheaper Alternatives)

Now, I know that these toys might not be for everyone, on the other hand, you might be surprised to know the fantasy sex toy niche has an army of avid followers who simply can’t get enough of these products. The reason…

Some people out there REALLY love Game of Thrones! Ok, I’m only messin’, (I think…) We’ll touch on that later.

But before we go any further lets talk a little more about Bad Dragon.

This little startup is housed in Arizona and boasts a load of dragon dildos on their website. And let me tell you. Each and every design has so much love and care put into it, you really feel it when you use one of their dildos, fleshlights, or vibrators on yourself. 

Now, it’s at this point you may be still slightly weirded out and still not quite ‘get it’...Well, all I will say is don’t judge a book by its cover. Instead take look at the 5 different Dragon Dildos designs I’m looking at and be amazed.

And now, for all you dirty little hobbits that have started in this fantasy quest…

However, before we dive in why not download your free infographic, to discover 13 highly sensitive erogenous zones...

What the Fuck is a Dragon Dildo?!

Bad Dragon is a company that creates fantasy-styled dildos.

As the company name implies, most of the dildos sold by this company are dragon schlongs.

Of course, you can find a couple tentacles and dragon tongues on their site, but mostly, you’re gonna see a whole bunch of ‘Flying Lizard Dicks’. 

And the good news…Each of the dragon dildos on the Bad Dragon Website are so different from each other that there’s bound to be something for you whether you’re from House Stark or Targaryen or more of a Witcher fan.

Finding The Best Dragon Dildo That Fits You...

No! These dildos are incredibly customizable! You can choose your ideal size, firmness and even color! 

I’ve reviewed a lot of sex toys in the past, but the number of options you have to customize these dildos are amazing! Just this fact alone makes Bad Dragon a great company this niche to buy from.

Along with Mr Hankeys Fantasy Dildos too.

Why Do These Even Exist?

The fantasy sex toy niche is larger than you’d originally think. While there are only a few large fantasy sex toy manufacturers, they have hundreds, even thousands of loyal users. (Now, including myself btw). 

Now, because the designers don’t have to make these dildos look like they’d belong to a real person, they can go crazy with ridges, veins and even the thickness of the dildo. 

Fantasy dildos probably aren’t for everyone, but if you’re really itching to know what it feels like to be fucked by a dragon, octopus, or even a unicorn, Bad Dragon’s dildos are a step in the right direction!

Which Is The Best Bad Dragon Dildo For Me?

I’m glad you asked.

I tried to choose a variety of different shapes, textures, and girths so there’s a little bit of something for everyone. 

Since I’m looking at toys from the same company, I can’t necessarily look at the ‘Pros and Cons’ of each individual toy because I’ll end up saying a lot of the same stuff. So here’s some thoughts that apply to the Bad Dragon Company as a whole:

Pros & Cons for the Best Bad Dragon Dildo

Firstly, lets talk about the Pro's

Each dildo is made in the US and is fully adaptive. I love how much you can customize your dildo. You can choose whatever size you prefer as well as the color and even the firmness of the material!

Bad Dragon wants you to feel like you bought the best goddamn dildo in the world. As such, they only use the highest quality silicone on the market. The silicone is also hand-poured as well to add that extra human touch a lot of sex toys lack. 

There are so many places Bad Dragon ‘could’ cut corners, but they never do and that’s what makes me seriously appreciate this company. A lot of the sex toys I review are very clearly mass-produced and while there’s nothing wrong with that, it feels nice to own something that someone very clearly created because they had a passion. 

You can add a cumtube feature to almost all of the dildos which simulates a real orgasm.

Even when I’m dating a woman, that doesn’t mean I don’t like little details like a bit of squirting inside my pussy. 

(Note: Unfortunately, not all of Bad Dragon’s toys can have the cumtube feature added so whenever you put a dildo in your cart, if the toy is capable of having a cumtube, the site will tell you. )

But alas, now I need to be fair and tell you the one thing that misses the mark about this company. Here goes...

The 'Con'

Shipping usually takes a while.

If you’re like me and you’re impatient as fuck this can be really annoying. If you look for reviews on TrustPilot (Bad Dragon doesn’t have reviews on their website), the first thing you’ll be greeted with is a 2-star rating and a lot of complaints about the slow as balls shipping times. 

Bad Dragon dildos are generally going to take a while to ship since they’re hand-cast and made to order in Arizona. If you’re ordering one and you’re outside of the US, shipping can take even longer which is ultra sucky.

Overall, the one 'con' isn't due to a poor product, just slow, annoying shipping. The product you receive is absolutely second to now and you should purchase your own dragon dildo when you get the chance.

Because if you want quality then it’s worth the wait.

But now that you have a better understanding, let’s look at some Best Bad Dragon Dildos and other Fantasy Dildos out there!

Ika

So, Ika has kinda ruined me. Ever since I discovered tentacle porn, I’ve wanted to possess as many tentacle-shaped sex toys as humanly possible. 

You’ll remember in my glass dildo article, I covered a tentacle dildo and it was one of my favorite ones out of the list. This Bad Dragon dildo is no exception. 

Ika is a tentacle-shaped dildo that has a slight curvature, making it great for G-spot stimulation.

The suckers on this baby allow for some extra stimulation while you’re using it. Just make sure you do a good job cleaning them after you’re done playing. There are a lot of nooks and crannies in this toy where bacteria could hide. 

So, I’ll extend my thanks to tentacle porn. I love how great toys feel while I’m shoving them inside myself, but you get what you pay for so I’m not complaining too much. 

My favorite color for this toy is Ika’s Signature which is a teal blue tint that fades to a pretty blue.

If you love your toys with some curve, you'll love the Scimitar. 

I love using this dildo when I want some extra stimulation. Because of its curvature it stimulates your G-spot, p-spot, and EVERY Spot there is.

Also dildo is one ridgey boy! 

The Scimitar features scale-like ridges on the underside of the shaft and grooves throughout the toy that give it a subtle texture. 

So, if you’re wondering why it has a shit ton of ridges, it’s because they feel so nice inside both your pussy and your ass! 

You see, if you have a vagina, you’ve probably noticed how hard it is to orgasm from internal stimulation alone. That’s because your vagina doesn’t have a lot of touch receptors in them. But it does have a lot of pressure receptors. Those ridges grind against your pussy and create amazing orgasms.

Its Scimitar is named after the famed sword from Middle Eastern, South Asian, or North African cultures, so let battle commence.

What can I say? I’m a nerdy degenerate...

Oh yeah and it also comes in different sizes, firmness and custom colors to create your perfect weapon 😉

Click Here and search Scimitar

Winston’s Tongue

If Ika’s my favorite dildo, Whiston's Tongue is my favorite clitoral stimulator. While you can use Winston’s Tongue for internal stimulation, it’s used best to simulate oral sex. I like to slick it up with some of Bad Dragon’s signature cum lube and let it swirl around my clit. 

Once I’m done, I move onto sticking it in my pussy. The wide base makes it easy to move around and let it lick all my favorite spots. While I’ll always love getting head from my partner, I can’t get enough of this toy when I’m traveling or my partner just isn’t in the mood to fuck me. 

My favorite color for Winston’s tongue would have to be Night Sky. This is a dark, onyx color marbled with a metallic blue. Such a pretty color is perfect for my favorite clitoral stimulator.

Mystic

Next up is Mystic, a unicorn horn styled dildo. 

This is probably the least intimidating of the dildos on this list. The shaft has a slight swirl to it, much like an actual unicorn horn. While the grooves aren’t as drastic as other dildos on this list, they still provide an amazing feeling when inserted. 

The soft ridges create a similar feeling to Apollo, but are much subtler. Mystic is great for those times when I’m not in the mood to have my brains fucked out (which is more frequent than you’d imagine) but I still want some ridges grinding downstairs.

When I first whipped out this toy, my partner was a bit skeptical. We had tried other Bad Dragon dildos in the past, and she wasn’t impressed by how beginner it looked.

But when I actually pulled it out and started using it on her clit, she couldn’t get enough of it! I’d definitely describe this toy as soft, but that softness really allows for some fun angles of insertion.

This is definitely my partner’s favorite toy and I and I have to say, I don't disagree with her choice. Like a real unicorn, it’s a lot mightier than it originally looks. 

My favorite color would have to be Mystic’s Signature. The fade from pink, to blue, to green just adds to the adorable Magical Girl look this toy oozes.

The other colors you can get this toy in just don’t look as adorable, so I can’t recommend Mystic’s Signature color enough!

Do you think its the best bad dragon dildo so far?

Stan

Now we’ve got the king of Big Boys. 

Stan is an absolute, uncircumcised unit. With all the veins and curves to this bad boy make penetration feel amazing. 

Of course, this particular dildo isn’t for everyone. I know when I whipped it out, my partner felt a lot more comfortable using Mystic instead. Needless to say, I used this as more of a solo toy. 

So you know how butt plugs give you that full-feeling? Well, this dildo gives me that full feeling in my goddamn pussy! I didn’t think that was possible! But I guess I shouldn’t have expected anything less from Stan. 

I really like how blunt the head is. It gives the toy a completely different feeling than the other toys on this list. It really contributes to that “full” feeling.

I also attached a suction cup to the base of this bad boy and ride it while I’m in the shower. I just can’t get enough of this dildo.

My favourite color for this toy would have to be Stan’s Signature. This gives the toy a metallic purple look over a red base. It makes Stan not only powerful but pretty as shit, too!

Defo in the running for the Best Bad Dragon Dildo out there.

When All Is Said And Done...

No matter which dildo you choose, you’re bound to love it! If you don’t see a dildo on the list that you’re excited about, check out Mr Hankeys and the wide range they have on offer.

They have dildos for every fantasy, so check those out here! 

==> Get more information on sex toys here.